Role Play

Well, for a long time i didnt know what to feel when i think of my better half & now i doubt if i feel anything at all. I cook for him, clean his house, wait on him & sleep with him, but does that make me a wife? May be it makes me a glorified maid servant with extra privileges and some perks free. I dont know. I still am emotionally attached to a lot more people than him. If i have a problem or if something is upsetting me, i think of others before i think of him. I get more consolation from people thousands of miles apart than the person who sleeps right next to me. I wonder why. Is it time, is it the circumstances or is it plain magnetism which draw people closer. When u r girlfriend boyfriend why do you buy chocolates/flowers for your gf? Is it because it is the done thing or because you know that she likes flowers and that it will make her happy or is it because people around you tell you that it is the way it is or is it because you love her being happy? Why is it that people celebrate anniversaries? Is it because they cherish the day they married each other or is it because they are doing it cos everybody else did it like it is the done thing? Everything that we do, we do either out of a sense of duty or out of love. Things that you do out of a sense of duty has no emotion attached to it, like doing a job, totally mechanical. Things you do out of love has a lot of care, planning & effort into it. Like I read somewhere, you realise what you had only after you lose it & it is too late to get it back. I still remember my birthday this year. I was quite lonely because i was living alone at that point of time. But, i didnt want a boring birthday , so i bought cake & candles for myself, treated myself to a private dinner & dessert & watched a good movie on tv, all alone. 2 of my very dear friends surprised me with birthday gifts at midnight, something i did not quite expect. Perhaps that was the last birthday i would ever celebrate with friends, with cake cutting at midnight & gifts. If you have a strong desire to relive the past, then it means that you dont love the present as much. I still love my brother a lot, perhaps the only man who can console me at bad times & knock some good sense into me. One bear hug is all it takes to wash away all my sorrow. I still lean on him for support, though we are physically thousands of miles apart. Doesnt it feel great to hear "I'll be there for you" from someone? Sometimes it helps to say it out loud and sometimes it does a lot more to do something equally nice, like a bear hug.